O Come, O Come, Emmanuel

Have Christmas carols become so familiar to you that the significance of the words often get missed?  That is definitely a struggle for me, but at my son's Christmas choir concert a few weeks ago, I was struck anew by the words and significance of the carol "O Come, O Come Emmanuel."

[Verse 1] 

O come, O come, Emmanuel, 

And ransom captive Israel, 

That mourns in lonely exile here, 

Until the Son of God appear. 

[Refrain] 

Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel 

Shall come to thee, O Israel. 

[Verse 2] 

O come, O come, Thou Lord of might, 

Who to Thy tribes, on Sinai's height, 

In ancient times didst give the law 

In cloud, and majesty and awe. 

[Refrain] 

[Verse 3] 

O come, Thou Rod of Jesse, free 

Thine own from Satan's tyranny; 

From depths of hell Thy people save, 

And give them victory o'er the grave. 

[Refrain] 

[Verse 4] 

O come, Thou Dayspring from on high, 

And cheer us by Thy drawing nigh; 

Disperse the gloomy clouds of night, 

And death's dark shadows put to flight. 

[Refrain] 

[Verse 5] 

O come, Thou Key of David, come 

And open wide our heavenly home; 

Make safe the way that leads on high, 

And close the path to misery. 

[Refrain]

The last few months have been so very hard for our family.  We have struggled with feelings of loneliness, abandonment, rejection, sadness, and grief, but we have taken comfort in knowing that Christ Jesus knows and experienced those same feelings. We can relate on a totally new level with the Israelites as they experienced exile, suffering, and hardship.  We wrestle with creeping in emotions of anger, bitterness, and resentment while wrestling to see and understand God's goodness and purpose in our dark and difficult journey in which we've been forced to walk alone.  It's hard to understand why we have to go through one of the hardest--perhaps the hardest--times of our lives without the peace and comfort of belonging to a body of Christ currently.  Perhaps you too are going through a hard time.  How can you relate to these words and find comfort?  Here's my personal application, and perhaps it will help you make your own application as you look to Emmanuel and Rejoice even in the midst of your own storm of life:

Exile is exactly where we are, but praise God, Emmanuel has ransomed the captive Russell family who mourns in lonely exile here. The Son of God has come to redeem us, and He promises to come again for the final rescue so that we can enter our haven of perfect peace and rest. Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel shall come to you, O Russell family!

Satan's role and influence in our family's struggle these past few months has been palpable.  The fact that he'd use some of God's children as his instruments to inflict further pain has left us dumbfounded.  He truly is the deceiver and absolutely seeks to devour!  Free the Russell family from Satan's tyranny! Save them from the depths of hell, and give them victory over the grave!

"Dayspring" is an archaic term used in in older versions of the Bible like the King James Version  in Luke 1:78 about the Messiah's coming. Other translations use "morning," "morning light," "sunrise," "dawn," etc. How appropriate to use that term in verse 4 to address Emmanuel before asking Him to cheer us by drawing near to us.  Morning Light, cheer us, the Russell family, with your presence drawn near, and disperse the gloomy clouds of night that engulf us!

Our sufferings remind us that this is not our home.  Our home awaits us in heaven.  Emmanuel is the Key to open the doors of heaven and to lead us home.  Please don't tarry, Emmanuel, for we long to have you close the path to misery here on Earth!

Because we live in a broken world, none of us go untouched by pain and suffering and sorrow and grief.  No matter what hard times you find yourself in the midst of, I pray that the beautiful and rich words of this wonderful Christmas carol would encourage you and lift your heart to Rejoice!  Rejoice! because Emmanuel shall come to you!

The God of Mercy and Kindness

Dane Ortlund's book Gentle and Lowly: The Heart of Christ for Sinners and Sufferers has not only helped renew my awe of God's love for me, but it has also opened my eyes anew to God's mercy and kindness that He lavishes on us as His children.  

It is comforting to know that when we fail and sin against Him, He doesn't abandon us.  He comes after as to pour His love and mercy over us.  It's as if He pursues us more when we have sinned or are suffering as we look to Him for forgiveness and help.  The key is that we need to come and turn to Him.  When we do, blessings abound:

What elicits tenderness from Jesus is not the severity of the sin but whether the sinner comes to him.  Whatever our offense, he deals gently with us.  If we never come to him, we will experience a judgment so fierce it will be like a double-edged sword coming out of his mouth at us (Rev. 1:16; 2:12; 19:15, 21).  If we do come to him, as fierce as his lion-like judgment would have been against us, so deep will be his lamb-like tenderness for us (cf. Rev. 5:5-6; Isa. 40:10-11) (p.54).

Further, Dane concludes chapter 5, "He Deals Gently," by reminding us:

Contrary to what we expect to be the case, therefore, the deeper into weakness and suffering and testing we go, the deeper Christ's solidarity with us.  As we go down into pain and anguish, we are descending ever deeper into Christ's very heart, not away from it.

Look to Christ.  He deals gently with you.  It's the only way he knows how to be.  He is the high priest to end all high priests.  As long as you fix your attention on your sin, you will fail to see how you can be safe.  But as long as you look to this high priest, you will fail to see how you can be in danger.  Looking inside ourselves, we can anticipate only harshness from heaven.  Looking out to Christ, we can anticipate only gentleness (p.57).

At the end of Chapter 6, "I Will Never Cast Out," Dane reminds us:

[Christ] cannot bear to part with his own, even when they most deserve to be forsaken...For those united to him, the heart of Jesus is not a rental; it is your new permanent residence.  You are not a tenant; you are a child.  His heart is not a ticking time bomb; his heart is the green pastures and still waters of endless reassurances of his presence and comfort, whatever our present spiritual accomplishments.  It is who he is (p.66).

Romans 5:20b states, "but where sin increased, grace abounded all the more" (ESV).  Dane expands that thought by stating:

The guilt and shame of those in Christ is ever outstripped by his abounding grace.  When we feel as if our thoughts, words, and deeds are diminishing God's grace toward us, those sins and failures are in fact causing it to surge forward all the more (p.68).

To further help us wrap our minds around such a glorious concept, Dane brings out an analogy:

...Christ being perfectly holy, knows and feels the horror and weight of sin more deeply  than any of us sinful ones could...Just as the purer a heart, the more horrified at evil, so also the purer a heart, the more it is naturally drawn out to help and relieve and protect and comfort, whereas a corrupt heart sits still, indifferent.  So with Christ (p.69).

Dane goes on to share a passage of Thomas Goodwin's book The Heart of Christ and summarizes it beautifully: "If you are part of Christ's own body, your sins evoke his deepest heart, his compassion and pity...He sides with you against your sin, not against you because of your sin.  He hates sin.  But he loves you" (p.71).

Just as a father does not abandon a son who messes up terribly, God our Father does not abandon us when we mess up terribly.  Thanks be to God!

Whether you have messed up and sinned terribly, or someone else's sin has splashed on you wounding you deeply, or whether you are suffering as a result of living in a broken world, take comfort!  God's mercy and kindness and love abounds!  He meets you where you are and pours a never ending love and mercy into you.  He sees and knows your pain, and He loves you all the more for it.  Keep turning to Him as the source of your comfort!

Meditate on the truths of "Mercies Anew," a song that sits among my favorites and so fitting for all that Dane reminded me of in Gentle and Lowly:

VERSE 1
Every morning that breaks
There are mercies anew
Every breath that I take
Is your faithfulness proved
And at the end of each day
When my labors are through
I will sing of Your mercies anew

VERSE 2
When I’ve fallen and strayed
There were mercies anew
For you sought me in love
And my heart you pursued
In the face of my sin
Lord, You never withdrew
So I sing of Your mercies anew

CHORUS
And Your mercies, they will never end
For ten thousand years they’ll remain
And when this world’s beauty has passed away
Your mercies will be unchanged

VERSE 3
And when the storms swirl and rage
There are mercies anew
In affliction and pain
You will carry me through
And at the end of my days
When Your throne fills my view
I will sing of Your mercies anew
I will sing of Your mercies anew

Music and words by Mark Altrogge and Bob Kauflin. © 2002 Sovereign Grace Praise/BMI (adm. by Integrity Music). Sovereign Grace Music, a division of Sovereign Grace Churches. All rights reserved.

My Loving Advocate

 "Stricken, Smitten, and Afflicted" by Thomas Kelly has been among my favorite hymns.  It vividly paints the picture of the affliction Jesus suffered on our behalf and tells us that because of that suffering, we have a firm foundation, a refuge, in the Rock of our salvation.  This hymn kept coming to mind as I continued to read Dane Ortland's Gentle and Lowly: The Heart of Christ for Sinners and Sufferers, because Dane points out how much the suffering of Christ allows Him to pour his love and mercy into our hearts and lives and how the more we suffer, the closer He gets and the more He pours into us.  During a time of reflection with the words of that hymn stuck in my mind, I decided to write a bit of poetry of sorts pulling in the truths I was reading in Dane's book about Christ, reflecting on that in light of my own afflictions, and connecting those reflections to the opening words of the great hymn.

My Loving Advocate

By: Christine Russell

 Stricken, smitten, and afflicted, Christ hangs dying on the cross.

 Tempted and tried by the devil, Christ rebukes Satan standing victorious.

 Quick to love and longing to embrace, Jesus stands with open arms ready.

 Knowing the pain of rejection and abandonment, Jesus relates to mortal men.

 

 Stricken, smitten, and afflicted, I lie buried in my loss.

 Tempted and tried by the devil, I wallow in my sin, far from glorious.

 Quick to hate and pushing Him away, I fail to keep my gaze steady.

 Knowing the pain of rejection and abandonment, I get stuck in the pit again.

 

 Stricken, smitten, and afflicted, Christ carries me through the worst.

 Tempted and tried by the devil, Christ advocates for me and my hurt.

 Quick to love and freely embracing me, Jesus’ heart of mercy is my refrain.

 Knowing the pain of rejection and abandonment, Jesus walks beside me in my pain.

 

 There is no greater Advocate than Jesus Christ alone.

 As I sin, as I sorrow, He stands before God’s throne.

 He speaks of me as holy, a beloved child of the King.

 Grace and mercy, peace and comfort are what He’ll bring.

 

©Copyright October 2024 Russell Musings

The God Who Sympathizes With My Weakness

 Since then we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need (Hebrews 4:14-16, ESV).

Jesus experienced all of the human emotions related to hard times, temptations, and deep suffering.  He truly knows our pain. He sympathizes with our pain, and He draws near to us in our pain allowing us to approach Him boldly to find mercy and grace to help us in our pain. 

I have been so encouraged reading Gentle and Lowly: The Heart of Christ for Sinners and Sufferers by Dane Ortlund.  He uses Scripture to pull back the curtain to reveal the heart of Christ for what it is. Christ's heart is glorious!  I have found myself falling in love with Christ all over again as I realize the depth of His love for me and how much His love seeks after me and pours into me in my hardest times.

Dane points out in the forth chapter "Able to Sympathize:" "That enticing temptation, that sore trial, that bewildering perplexity--he has been there.  Indeed, his utter purity suggests that he has felt these pains more acutely than we sinners ever could" (p. 48). He then goes on to say, "...when the fallenness of the world closes in on us and makes us want to throw in the towel--there, right there, we have a Friend who knows exactly what such testing feels like, and sits close to us, embraces us. With us. Solidarity" (p. 48).

When hard times come, I tend to pull back and isolate.  Loneliness becomes my constant presence.  I look to God for help, but He feels distant, far away.  This book has opened my eyes to how much my Savior can relate to my suffering and how much He pursues me in it rather than flees from me. Dane described me perfectly then helped me see the truth of the Bible: 

"Our tendency is to feel intuitively that the more difficult life gets the more alone we are.  As we sink further into pain, we sink further into felt isolation.  The Bible corrects us.  Our pain never outstrips what he himself shares in.  We are never alone.  The sorrow that feels so isolating, so unique, was endured by him in the past and is now shouldered by him in the present" (p.48).  

Dane concludes chapter 4 by stating, "If you are in Christ, you have a Friend who, in your sorrow, will never lob down a pep talk from heaven.  He cannot bear to hold himself at a distance.  Nothing can hold him back.  His heart is too bound up with yours." I've been washed Christ's His blood.  He laid down His life for me.  As a result, my heart is bound with His, so He can't leave me or forsake me!  Praise the Lord, I'm never alone! Praise the Lord that my God sympathizes with my weakness!

Lament Explored: Part V: How to Lament

 Note:  This is Part IV of my 5-Part exploration of Lament.  Use the link below to read my previous post.  

Part I:  What is Lament?

Part II: What does Lament do?

Part III: Lament Contrasted

Part IV:  Trust Born From Lament

Part V: How to Lament

Part V:  How to Lament

“Rather than being angry, fearful, apathetic, or despairing, we should choose to lament.  We can follow the example of lament psalms, moving through complaint toward trust…We should express our sorrow while allowing lament to reaffirm the important spiritual realities underlying our lives, our culture, and our future.  God has a bigger plan.  He can be trusted” (Vroegop, p.103).

You will see patterns and variations of these 4 steps throughout the Psalms of Lament.  Use them to guide you in your own prayers of lament.

Turn: An address to God

“The first step in lament pushes against [deafening silence—prayerlessness] by calling us to keep praying” (Vroegop, p.142).  

Vroegop description:  “Address God as you come to him in prayer.  This is sometimes combined with complaint” (Vroegop, Appendix 3).  

Example from a Psalm of Lament: Psalm 4:1 - “Answer me when I call to you, O my righteous God.”

Complain:  A complaint to God

“Through godly complaint we are able to express our disappointment and move toward a resolution.  We complain on the basis of our belief in who God is and what he can do” (Vroegop, p.44).

“The lament psalms teach us that these feelings should not be dismissed as invalid or sinful.  They are part of the journey—an aspect of genuine faith” (Vroegop, p.46).

Vroegop description: “Identify in blunt language the specific pain or injustice.  Why or how is often part of the complaint” (Vroegop, Appendix 3).  

Example from a Psalm of Lament: Psalm 10:1 - “Why, O LORD, do you stand far off?  Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?”

Ask: A bold request of God

Vroegop description: “Specifically call upon god to act in a manner that fits his character and resolves your complaint” (Vroegop, Appendix 3).  

Example from a Psalm of Lament: Psalm 13:3 - “Look on me and answer, O Lord my God.  Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death;”

Trust: An expression of trust and/or praise

Vroegop description: “Affirm God’s worthiness to be trusted, and commit to praising him” (Vroegop, Appendix 3).

Example from a Psalm of Lament: Psalm 28:6-7 – “The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped.  My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song.”

Conclusion:

“[T]he steps of lament must be learned.  It is vital to the Christian faith.  It is how we make our way through the pains of life while clinging to the hope of the gospel” (Vroegop, p.84).

Learn these steps.  Meditate on the Psalms of Lament to help you in that process and get lamenting!

Reflect on these final thoughts on lament:

“Prayerfully celebrate the reign of God even when you have no idea how the plan will unfold.  The presence of pain—no matter how strong—does not negate the plan of God.  He still reigns.  Therefore, we can tearfully pray one last prayer” (Vroegop, p.148).

“Private lament—all alone with God—has the potential to bring healing to your soul and strength to your heart as you walk a lonely road” (Vroegop, p.170).

“Pain and hardship come in unexpected and unwelcomed waves.  Lament is the personal song that expresses our grief while embracing God’s goodness” (Vroegop, p.172).

“When dark clouds roll in, lament is the path to find mercy—even as the clouds linger.  Lament is the bridge between dark clouds and deep mercy” (Vroegop, p.190).

I pray that lament will be as much of a blessing to you as it has been to me. 

“I am still confident of this:  I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.  Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.” ~ Psalm 27:13-14

Lament Explored: Part IV: Trust Born from Lament

Note:  This is Part IV of my 5-Part exploration of Lament.  Use the link below to read my previous post.  

Part I:  What is Lament?

Part II: What does Lament do?

Part III: Lament Contrasted

Part IV:  Trust Born From Lament

Part V: How to Lament

Part IV: Trust Born From Lament

“Trust is believing what you know to be true even though the facts of suffering might call that belief into question.  Lament keep us turning toward trust by giving us the language to step into the wilderness between our painful reality and our hopeful longings” (Vroegop, p.77).

When in the middle of the pain and sorrow, sometimes it is so hard to keep trusting God.  The magnitude of the pain and hurt can sometimes shadow God's goodness and care.  That's where lament becomes crucial!  Lament has a way of keeping the right perspective.  It can help you to see God's goodness and care in the midst of the trial or despite the trial.  When this current trial began almost 4 months ago, everything was so shocking and sudden and traumatic, that I became blind to God's goodness.  Everything was just so big and painful and dark.  For the first time after so many trials in my life, I felt that my faith in God was shaken.  Two weeks before my world came crashing down, I realized that for the first time in many, many years, life seemed to have hit a smooth rhythm.  The trials with our son's mental health and our other son's medical needs had calmed significantly.  Other than a significant battle I was fighting from a midwifery front and an occasional struggles in helping our sons find their life's purpose, life was eerily calm, and life was good.  This realization was so shocking, I was afraid to voice it out loud, so I had kept it to myself.  Since my world came crashing down, I had discussed that realization with my husband, who in turn said he had had that very thought around that same time and also chose to keep quiet about it.  Needless to say, we didn't get to enjoy that peace for long, and when our world crashed around us, it was hard for me to not struggle with doubt about God's goodness, anger that He couldn't allow us to enjoy being on the mountain for a little longer before crashing into the valley, and sorrow over how much grief and trauma we were experiencing.

Thankfully, I didn't stay in that dark place of lack of trust for very long.  God used my journey into lament to give my faith wings and help me trust Him again.

In Dark Clouds Deep Mercy: Discovering the Grace of Lament, Mark Vroegop reveals how lament can birth trust:

“Choosing to trust through lament requires that we rejoice without knowing how all the dots connect.  We decide to let God be his own interpreter, trusting that somehow his gracious plan is being worked out—even if we can’t see it” (Vroegop, p.79).

“When pain topples our idols, lament invites self-examination.  We can see more clearly the misplaced objects of trust that surface when the layers are peeled back.  Pain helps us to see who we are and what we love” (Vroegop, p.126).

“Prayers of lament are designed to remind us that God is worthy to be trusted—even in this!” (Vroegop, p.79).

“Lament leads to trust, but the path is not always clear or straightforward.  By turning to prayer, laying out our complaints, and boldly asking, we are brought by God to a place of growing trust in him” (Vroegop, p.84).

“Whatever you do, don’t stop making this turn toward trust.  Learn to live in the tension of pain beyond belief and divine sovereignty beyond comprehension by stepping into trust” (Vroegop, p.84).

“Tear-filled prayers, wrestling through tough questions, and banking my life on the promises of God are all part of the journey to keep me trusting.  Learning to lament leads to trust” (Vroegop, p.85).

“Through turning to God in prayer, laying out our complaints, and asking boldly for God’s help, we are led to place our trust in a God who cares for us and hears us” (Vroegop, p.85).

“Learning to lament gives us the grace to keep trusting” (Vroegop, p.85).

“In lament we affirm what we believe…In our fear and confusion, lament leads us back to what we know to be true:  ‘Despite what I see, despite what I feel, God is good.’  Lament helps us to interpret pain through the lens of God’s character and his ultimate mercy…Lament is the language that moves us from our sorrow toward the truth of God’s promises” (Vroegop, p.119).

“When brokenness becomes your life, lament helps you to turn to God.  It lifts your head and turns your tear-filled eyes toward the only hope you have:  God’s grace” (Vroegop, p.142).

Don't stop trusting God in the midst of your suffering!  Turn to Him in lament, and let him help you start trusting again!

Lament Explored: Part III: Lament Contrasted

 Note:  This is Part III of my 5-Part exploration of Lament.  Use the links below to read my previous posts.  

Part I:  What is Lament?

Part II: What does Lament do?

Part III: Lament Contrasted

Part IV:  Trust Born From Lament

Part V: How to Lament

Part III:  Lament Contrasted

“Life is full of vexing questions related to God’s purposes.  Pain often highlights perplexing paradoxes.  Lament is expressed even though the tension remains” (Vroegop, p.95-96).

We can’t begin to understand the mind and heart of God, but we can be confident that His purposes are for our good and His glory, even when they don’t feel that way. 

Lament in many ways helps us reconcile the truths about God and what we are feeling in the deepest, darkest pit. 

As I have journeyed through lament, I have seen firsthand how contrasting outside realities can be from my inner realities or God’s realities.

When the storm rages around me and one bad thing after another falls on me seeking to suffocate the life out of me, lament leads me to an inner stillness that God is still in control, and His peace is still mine as I turn to him in complaint of my circumstances, asking for His deliverance, and reminding myself and Him of His unfailing promises.  When failed leadership and injustice knock the breath out of me, lament reminds me of the brokenness of the world I live in and the sharp contrast of my Shepherd leader King who is always just. On the days when dark clouds of loneliness feel so heavy, lament helps me realize that I am not alone and that God is right there with me walking alongside of me or carrying me when I am too weak to walk on my own.

In Dark Clouds Deep Mercy: Discovering the Grace of Lament, Mark Vroegop makes many contrasting statements about lament that deserve a pause for meditation:

“Lament is not merely an expression of sorrow; it is a memorial” (Vroegop, p.90).

“Lament not only vocalizes the pain but can also memorialize the message beneath the struggle—if we’ll listen and not forget” (Vroegop, p.94).

“Lament doesn’t wait for resolution.  It gives voice to the tough questions before the final chapter is written” (Vroegop, p.96).

“Lament not only mourns the brokenness of suffering; it also looks expectantly toward what is yet to come” (Vroegop, p.116).

“Instead of running from the shame of sorrow, lament embraces it.  Lament looks through the fog for the grace of God’s remembrance.  The road map to grace involves an appeal for God to remember while at the same time rehearsing the pain” (Vroegop, p.144).

“Lament is never a song you set out to sing.  But in the discovery of lament, everyone can find grace for the pains of life” (Vroegop, p.172).

Lament is necessary to make sense of a life of juxtapositions. Lament helps us make sense of this confusing, broken world.  Lament helps us come out on the other end of grief and sorrow to the promise of unending joy and gladness in our life yet to come.

“In lament, we are honest with the struggles of life while also reminding ourselves that God never stops being God.  His steadfast love never ends.  He is sufficient.  Therefore, our hope is not in a change of circumstances but in the promises of a God who never stops being merciful—even when dark clouds loom.  His mercy never ceases” (Vroegop, p.113-114).

Lament Explored: Part II: What does Lament do?

Note:  This is Part II of my 5-Part exploration of Lament.  Use the link below to read my previous post.  

Part I:  What is Lament?

Part II: What does Lament do?

Part III: Lament Contrasted

Part IV:  Trust Born From Lament

Part V: How to Lament

Part II:  What does Lament do?

“Lament can tune your heart to seek more than just the removal of pain.  It invites us to say ‘remember, O LORD,’ ‘you reign,’ and ‘restore us.’  And in our asking for God to deliver us, it can also lead us to the greatest need of all: our need to be right with God” (Vroegop, p.150).

Thanks for continuing this lament journey with me.  It is my prayer that these truths become a balm to your soul as you walk your own journey in lament.

Continuing in Dark Clouds Deep Mercy: Discovering the Grace of Lament, Mark Vroegop tells us many things that lament does:

Lament…

• “keeps us turning toward trust by giving us language to step into the wilderness between our painful reality and our hopeful longings” (Vroegop, p.77).
• “calls us to point our hearts Godward by rejoicing in God’s grace…Entering lament leads to rejoicing” (Vroegop, p.81).
• “creates a path through the messy wilderness of pain” (Vroegop, p.84).
• “can provide mercy when dark clouds loom” (Vroegop, p.84).
• “pivot[s] on God’s promises” (Vroegop, p.85).
• “can be a prism through which we see a path for growth” (Vroegop, p.90).
• “tunes the heart so it can sing about trust” (Vroegop, p.83).
• “can retune our hearts to what’s really important.  It can invite us to consider what lies underneath our lives—what really matters” (Vroegop, p.92).
• “invite[s] us to consider lessons emerging from the rubble” (Vroegop, p.100).
• “gives you eyes to see the brokenness around you” (Vroegop, p.103).
• “can awaken our souls from apathy.  It can help us as we intentionally mourn the devastating effects of sin in our lives and the world” (Vroegop, p.103).
• “can be a welcome wake-up call—a memorial—to the brokenness of the world and the holiness of God” (Vroegop, p.104).
• “has the potential to turn our hearts Godward as wee sing in a minor key about our individual and corporate need for God’s mercy” (Vroegop, p.104).
• “reminds us that the problem with the world is sin, and God is the only one who can make it right” (Vroegop, p.104).
• “dares to hope while life is hard” (Vroegop, p.110).
• “can help you by rehearsing the truth of the Bible—to preach to your heart, to interpret pain through the lens of God’s character and ultimate mercy” (Vroegop, p.111).
• “helps us to dare to hope again, and again, and again” (Vroegop, p.112).
• “can turn our hearts toward a future victory.  Through tears, we can still believe that the final word has not been spoken” (Vroegop, p.117).
• “can remind us that pain has a purpose” (Vroegop, p.118).
• “penetrates the vault of our self-sufficiency and shows us the spiritual bankruptcy of trusting in financial security” (Vroegop, p.127).
• “calls us to not ignore the cries of our culture” (Vroegop, p.132).
• “shows us how to think and what to pray when our idols become clear” (Vroegop, p.137).
• “identifies the way back to God and even the gospel itself.  Lament can be a road map to God’s grace” (Vroegop, p.140).
• “affirms God’s sovereignty when dark clouds linger” (Vroegop, p.147).
• “brings comfort to the mourning bench by refusing to pretend ‘everything’s fine’ or to remain distant.  Lament sits close” (Vroegop, p.162).
• “provides a helpful structure for a hurting person to process pain and feelings” (Vroegop, p.165).
• “helps us find the balance between an appropriate desire for justice and the command to be merciful while having a forgiving spirit” (Vroegop, p.167).
• “gives us a language for godly sorrow and a reason to hope again” (Vroegop, p.168).
• “can shine the light on what we need to confess.  It can remind us how much we need God’s grace” (Vroegop, p.169).
• “can provide language to express the depth of sorrow while leading us to hope, praise, and trust” (Vroegop, p.178).
• “has the potential to provide a first step toward uniting people when hurt and misunderstanding are in the air” (Vroegop, p.184).
• “can be the language we use to weep with those who weep” (Vroegop, p.185).
• “tunes our heart to truths undergirding our lives and the world in which we live…Lament is how we tunnel our way to truth” (Vroegop, p.190).
• “gives us hope because it gives us a glimpse of the truth” (Vroegop, p.192).
• “vocalizes a desire for justice that is unfulfilled” (Vroegop, p.193).
• “allows us to hear the brokenness around us, weep with those who weep, and walk with them on the long road of sorrow” (Vroegop, p.194).

 Lament also helps us to realize that we do not belong to this world and helps expose the depths of our own sin:

“Lamenting the toppling of our cultural idols can reorient Christian exiles as to what King and what kingdom we were supposed to long for” (Vroegop, p.136).

“Practicing lament can facilitate personal confession and a greater sensitivity to sin” (Vroegop, p.168).

I have deeply felt the truth of this final statement these past few months:

“When God strips you of everything, and all you have is him, you have enough.  Therefore, lament can awaken you to the truth of God’s hesed [God’s covenant love for His people].  It can remind you that God is everything you really need” (Vroegop, p.113).

Lament Explored: Part I: What is Lament?

 “A broken world will bring its share of grief, but it can also bring wisdom if we are willing to slow down, listen, and learn” (Vroegop, p.100).

As I have journeyed in lament these last several months, I have been amazed by all that I have learned about God and myself as I reflect on the pain, turn to God, and cry out to Him in the midst of my deepest sorrows.  While I do not like the pain one bit and long to see light at end of this very long tunnel, I am grateful that these months of darkness have not been wasted, and that God has been my source of light over and over again keeping me from stumbling in my darkness. 

I’ve never really thought much about lament.  The first time I even considered lament was in 2022 when a dear friend encouraged me to read Ragged: Spiritual Disciplines for the Spiritually Exhausted by Gretchen Ronnevik.  I’ve never considered lamenting to be a discipline of grace not to mention be a part of my life.  In fact, as a child, I was told by my pastor that I shouldn’t question God but just trust Him.  That never made sense to me as I studied God’s Word, particularly the Psalms, where the psalmists often boldly questioned God.

This journey in lament has been an awakening to the goodness of God in the midst of the hard times.  Lament has given voice and words to my prayers when all I could do was groan initially.  At the start of my lament journey, I began to read Dark Clouds Deep Mercy: Discovering the Grace of Lament by Mark Vroegop.  I have learned so much, and I don’t ever want to forget it, so I’ve been doing a lot of note taking, journaling, and praying my own prayers of lament or using one of the psalmist’s when I can’t seem to find the words myself.  I want to share what I have learned with others to help them find comfort in the midst of their sorrows.  Because there is so much to share, I am breaking down my thoughts into several parts and basing my content off of Vroegop’s wonderful book on Lament:

Part I:  What is Lament?

Part II: What does Lament do?

Part III: Lament Contrasted

Part IV:  Trust Born From Lament

Part V: How to Lament

“Whatever the reason, loss can feel like a wasteland.  It’s devastating.  But lament helps us to rehearse biblical truth so hope will return.  Despite what you see, despite what you feel, despite what you think, lament can be a supply of grace as you affirm that God’s mercies are new every day” (Vroegop, p.106-107).

Come journey with me!

Part I:  What is Lament?

Ryan Higginbottom defines lament nicely for us:  “A lament is a prayer expressing sorrow, pain, or confusion.  Lament should be the chief way Christians process grief in God’s presence.”

(Biblical Lament: What it is and How to Do It by Ryan Higginbottom. June 13, 2022. https://openthebible.org/article/biblical-lament-what-it-is-and-how-to-do-it/#:~:text=What%20is%20Lament%3F,process%20grief%20in%20God's%20presence.)

In Dark Clouds Deep Mercy: Discovering the Grace of Lament, Mark Vroegop gives us several definitions of Lament:

Lament is…

• “a minor-key language for my suffering” (Vroegop, p.17).
• “a place to learn” (Vroegop, p.91).
• “a journey through the shock and awe of pain” (Vroegop, p.96).
• “the song we sing while living in a world that is under the curse of sin” (Vroegop, p.99).
• “an uncomfortable yet helpful teacher” (Vroegop, p.100).
• “one of the ways that a heart is tuned toward God’s perspective” (Vroegop, p.103).
• “the language of those stumbling in their journey to find mercy in dark clouds” (Vroegop, p.108).
• “a prayer of faith despite your fear” (Vroegop, p.110).
• “the language that calls us, as exiles, to uncurl our fingers from our objects of trust” (Vroegop, p.123).
• “the song you sing when diving blessing seems far away” (Vroegop, p.136).
• “a prayer in pain that leads to trust” (Vroegop, p.158).
• “the prayer language for those who are struggling with sadness” (Vroegop, p.162).
• “a means of grace, no matter what trial you face.  This biblical song of sorrow can become a personal pathway for mercy when darkness has settled in” (Vroegop, p.170).
• “the language of loss as we grieve together” (Vroegop, p.187).
• “how we experience grace no matter what we face” (Vroegop, p.191).
• “the language that helps you believe catastrophe can become eucatastrophe [Tolkein’s word for ‘unexpected appearance of goodness’].  It vocalizes the pain of the moment while believing that helps is on the way” (Vroegop, p.192). 

Consider these final thoughts:

“Through all the pain, the questions, the unfair treatment at the hands of others, and the injustice, lament leads us to a place of worship” (Vroegop, p.83).

“Lament is how you live between a hard life and God’s promises.  It is how we learn to sing and worship when suffering comes our way” (Vroegop, p.84).

“Lament prayers cry out to God and ask him for deliverance: ‘God, this hurts! Please help me!’” (Vroegop, p. 148).

“Dark clouds can yield deep mercy as lament leads to Christ” (Vroegop, p.152).

“Regardless of the pain, lament is always the God-given path through grief” (Vroegop, p.165).

Not Wasting the Waiting

I have never found waiting to be comfortable.  It’s hard to sit and not do nothing.  Yet, sometimes God calls us to that very place of waiting – waiting for His deliverance, waiting for His answer to prayer, waiting for his help, waiting for the end of one’s pain and suffering.  In my current painful spot of waiting, I am learning to not waste the waiting.  I am learning the beauty of lament as I turn to God and sit back and wait for His answer and deliverance.  I am leaning on His deep mercy as I sit under dark and looming clouds.

As I have journeyed this time of waiting, I have been reading Dark Clouds Deep Mercy by Mark Vroegop.  It has been exactly what I have needed during a difficult, lonely, painful family trial.  This book has helped give words to my groans as I turn to God in prayer making my complaints known, lifting my requests to my faithful God, and reminding Him and me of His faithfulness to His promises.  I have loved walking through Psalms of Lament and studying Lamentations learning anew what lament looks like and how important it is.  

In Dark Clouds Deep Mercy, Mark points out four truths on which Jeremiah “anchored his heart,” the second of which is “Waiting is not a waste” (p. 114).  Mark introduces the point stating: “…waiting for anything feels like a complete waste of time. Waiting for God to move or answer seems even worse.  Lamentations 3: 25-27 shows us the value of living in space between suffering and restoration. Lament serves us well as we mourn and wait” (p.114).

Lamentations 3:25-27 says:

“The LORD is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him.  It is good that one should wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD.  It is good for a man that he bear the yoke of his youth” (ESV).

Mark points out that in the Hebrew translation, each of those 3 sentences start with the Hebrew word “good.” 

Can waiting be “good?”

Mark has some really good insight into waiting that was such an encouragement to me that I wanted to write it down, and I figured if I am writing it, I should probably share it because it’s too good to miss out on the good and even beauty of waiting.

“To wait on the Lord means to place your hope in him—to trust that God is the one who can deliver you.  Your entire confidence rests on him.  We wait upon the Lord because he is God and we are not.

“Why is waiting so difficult?  Because it feels as if we’re not doing anything.  And that’s the point.  You’re not doing anything, but God is” (p. 114).

“Waiting puts us in an uncomfortable place where we’re out of control of our lives” (p. 115).

“Waiting can be hard because of the fear of what might happen.  Our inability to do anything but wait is a powerless feeling” (p. 115).

“Rather than resisting this season, we can see waiting as an opportunity for life-changing lessons” (p.115).

“If God’s providence requires you to wait, remind your heart that much good can come from this season…In the midst of suffering, remember that waiting on the Lord is not a waste” (p.115).

I love to be organized. I love to have everything in its place and details all laid out.  I like to have control of circumstances and outcomes, responses, and even people, if I’m honest.  Recognizing that I have no control over circumstances and life can be terrifying if I dwell on that thought too long.  God likes to use the hard things in life to remind me over and over again (because I am so quick to forget!) that He’s in control, not me.  He’s got this!  I absolutely don’t!  Such a hard thing to swallow, but it’s so important for me to surrender to that truth.  Because God’s got this, I don’t have to do anything but be faithful and obedient.  It’s time for me to enter that waiting looking for God’s answers and deliverance.  I’m seeking to use this “pause” to learn what God is trying to teach me and to see how He will sovereignly work all the currently hard and messy things for my good and His glory.  These are the passages and thoughts I am turning to in my waiting:

It's time for me to “Be still and know that [He is] God” (Psalm 46:10a, ESV).

I need to say repeatedly: “I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living! Wait for the LORD; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the LORD!” (Psalm 27:13-14, ESV)

“I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in his word I hope; my soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen for the morning, more than watchmen for the morning” (Psalm 130:5-6, ESV)

“Behold, the eye of the LORD is on those who fear him, on those who hope in his steadfast love, that he may deliver their soul from death and keep them alive in famine.  Our soul waits for the LORD; he is our help and our shield.  For our heart is glad in him, because we trust in his holy name.  Let your steadfast love, O LORD, be upon us, even as we hope in you” (Psalm 33:18-22, ESV).

“Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way, over the man who carries out evil devices” (Psalm 37:7, ESV).

I must remind myself repeatedly: “For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from him” (Psalm 62:5, ESV).

One of the many verses and quotes I have around my bathroom mirror has been a helpful reminder during this current time of waiting: “The LORD will fight for you, and you have only to be silent” (Exodus 14:14, ESV).

All of the reflection on waiting reminded me of one of my favorite verses:

“but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint” (Isaiah 40:31, ESV).

Lord, I am waiting for you.  Please renew my strength.  Help me not to grow weary and faint as I do so, and as I walk the painful path of life You have for me right now. Amen.

“From of old no one has heart or perceived by ear, no eye has seen a God besides you, who acts for those who wait for him” (Isaiah 64:4, ESV).